Gears of War 3: RAAM's Shadow DLC review

Another DLC, but this time Epic Games is going to “try” having some value to it. Close to three months later, Epic Games delivers Gears of War 3 a campaign add-on. Luckily for players, it’s not just new; characters, weapons and weapons skins. The campaign add-on is actually a full act which may take an hour or so to complete.

In the RAAM’s Shadow DLC, you’re starting out as part of Zeta Squad post-Emergence Day. Zeta Squad consist of four Gears; Michael Barrick, Lt. Minh Young Kim (first seen in Gears of War), Alicia Valera and Tai Kaliso (first seen in Gears of War 2). Your task is to evacuate Llima City due to a Locust Kryllstorm approaching. While Zeta Squad is rescuing civilians and looking for remaining comrades, General RAAM is back in the picture destroying and killing the humans as ordered by Queen Myrrah.

For the first time in Gears of War history, you’re able to control General RAAM and use his abilities you saw in Gears of War. He only has two ways of attacking the humans. You can both point to an enemy and send out Kryll to chop up the humans or slice and stab humans with your Locust sword. Unfortunately, they made RAAM this bad-ass and can only get damage when he releases the Kryll.

While protecting or killing the Locust, you’re going to run into new forms of enemies. Introducing in the campaign add-ons are Mauler Elites and Theron Elites. Mauler Elites are another variant of a Mauler. They look like something from Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim and they also have new boomshield which reflect fire. Theron Elites are tougher Theron Guards. Theron Elites use an ink grenade called a Kryll grenade. This is similar to an Ink grenade. Instead of ink damaging you, you’re being attacked by Kryll. They also use the ink as an evasive strategy. A new Elite Sawed-Off shotgun is also carried with them. Unlike the other shotgun, these have curved blades which you can charge with them and stab like a retro lancer.

In addition, the Locust again emerges from sinkholes and attack. Only the Theron Guards (from what I noticed) are exploding through the ground like a rocket launch.

There were some noticeable flaws during the added campaign. One is manipulating objects. Sure you’re able to opens doors and what not, but you’re not able to press the piano key on the piano. This isn’t technically a flaw, but it was noticeable you couldn’t manipulate any objects like in the game’s main story. Another flaw was not telling the players to press a button and kick something out of the way for access. I was caught on a part, because there was a table in my way. I shot at it, and use a frag grenade to blow it up. It had no effect whatsoever. I Didn’t know a simple button could kick the table out of the way. Also, I feel General RAAM is too overpowered throughout the campaign.

The only true good thing about the add-on is you’re playing as General RAAM and using his own special abilities. It’s great to be back to post-Emergence Day, but the rest of the add-on complete waste of time. No story whatsoever, just bunch of killing Locust and humans. The only actual story you see is sort of a prelude, Jace’s reasoning to join the COG. You won’t even get to see that until the near ending of the add-on .

“You never know, there might be a hobbit” said Cliff Bleszinski talking to Jimmy Fallon about Gears of War 3. Was RAAM’s Shadow DLC the “hobbit” Bleszinski may have accidentally revealed? I sure hope not. What I want to see is something new and original. Sure being able to use General RAAM is new and original, but it’s not worth 15 dollars in my opinion. For the reason it’s only an add-on and not a full game, I’m going to give an B+

+General RAAM is back with new abilities

-…Unfortunately is overpowered

+Campaign Add-on

-No actual story plot

+New characters

+New weapons

*grading scale based on GameRevolution.com's classic grading scale.

This week's random thought

This week's random thought. Please subscribe to my YouTube page. Follow me on Twitter, my handle is @UghRochester

Anyone loves Rick Rolling?

I enjoy the occasional Rick Roll from time to time. Not for the pranks, but the song is quite catchy. So, I did a karaoke version of it. Enjoy!

Happy 25 years Ubisoft. Also, a free game included.

Today marks the calendar of Ubisoft's 25 year anniversary. You're probably familiar with their works of the Assassin's Creed series which recently released Assassin's Creed: Revelations just a few weeks ago. Congratulations to Ubisoft for surviving 25 years of hard work. Ubisoft, in celebration of the 25 years in service, has created a flash game. The flash game test your coordination skills to see if you can throw a pie the farthest. I must say it's a pretty fun little flash game to compete with others around the world.

As shown in the picture above, I'm actually 21st around the world on the leaderboard. If I selected only in the United States, I would be 3rd place. 

Goodbye Game Pro Magazine

I received news from multiple sources sharing Game Pro Magazine will be incorporated with sister site PCWorld. On December 5th, Game Pro will be no more. Just to think, it has been 22 years they've been around. R.I.P. Game Pro Magazine.

UghRochester's random thought

Each week (either Monday or Tuesday) I'm going to post my random thought. What could it be? Watch and listen.

UghRochester on The GR Roundtable

I just got off work, and slept for about an hour before this podcast. So, feel free to listen to how slow I was. My communication skills are not the best. Again, join Daniel Bischoff, Longo_2_guns and myself in The GR Roundtable of Batman: Arkham City

Kinect 2 reported to recognize lips

A new report has been made from Eurogamer stating the Kinect 2 will be strong enough recognize lip movements

"One development source told Eurogamer that Kinect 2 will be so powerful it will enable games to lip read, detect when players are angry, and determine in which direction they are facing."

So what does that mean? Will it also have a voice automated service saying, "Calm down, no need to get upset. There are no such thing as losers." Imagine what the Kinect 2 would do if The Incredible Hulk was playing. Also, this gives more evidence on the rumored Xbox LOOP might be announced next year.

XBLA Cyber Monday deals

Larry Hyrb aka "Major Nelson" has announced the XBLA Cyber Monday deals. You get to select only four titles! The titles are "Mortal Kombat Arcade Collection"  "Beyond Good & Evil"  "Dungeons & Dragons Daggerdale" and "Risk Factions." Many users are disappointed in the selection, but I've read Beyond Good and Evil is pretty great.

Japan's PS Vita Commercial revealed

If I had learn Japanese, I would tell you what it says during the commercial. Most likely it's just advertising its price and you (if you're in Japan) can get one. Nonetheless, here's Japan's short commercial for the PS Vita

Attention shoppers, UghRochester is here.

So, what happened after my Thanksgiving meal? I went to Wal-Mart and saw the madness of Black Friday. My goal was to get Battlefield 3. It didn't turn out so well.

Could there be a Gears of War prequel?

So, I’ve been thinking about this for a good while. Cliff Bleszinski even mentioned on the Late Night Show with Jimmy Fallon about Gears of War ending “like Lord of the Rings style.” When Fallon asked Bleszinski, he replied, “You never know. There might be a hobbit.”

At first I didn’t think anything of it. Epic has already done a great job with The Gears of War series, but then again they’re published by Microsoft who loves milking the money as you have witnessed from the announcement at E3 of a new Halo trilogy. Epic has announced couple weeks ago RAAM’s Shadow add-on. From what I’ve read, it is during events post-Emergence Day. So, could this new DLC may be just a splash of a new series to be announced?

If they were to make a prequel, then it will most likely focus on The Pendulum Wars. If you don’t know this, The Pendulum Wars were battles of the COG (Coalition of Ordered Governments) and The UIR (Union of Independent Republics) fighting over this miracle energy known as imulsion. Epic does have the ability to tell more about characters like Marcus Fenix and Dominic Santiago, and maybe add a few new characters. There’s Helena Stroud (Anya’s mother) and Carlos Santiago (Dom’s older brother) who could become part of the new works.

Seeing how Epic Games shows us their timeline, I’m calling it out. I predict that Epic will somehow create a game based on The Pendulum Wars. Could it be possible? Would this be the Hobbit Cliff Bleszinski said? We’ll find out more when years to come.

Gears of War 3 Review

It seemed like there’s not much left of Sera. First the Pendulum Wars, followed by Emergence Day. War is all we’ve been doing. Surviving in all this mayhem has just added a new difficulty, a new species known as The Lambent. The Lambent is everywhere!

Let’s recover the timeline with quick summaries before we explore the conclusion to one of Epic’s greatest game series. First off, if you haven’t played any of the previous games, then why are you playing Gears of War 3? Anyways, In Gears of War, you start off 14 years after E-Day. You began with Marcus Fenix in a jail cell for disobeying Colonel Hoffman’s order and looking Marcus’s dad. Your close friend Dominic “Dom” Santiago comes to the rescue. Along the way you find other remaining Gears; Damn Baird, Augustus Cole etc. After their plan to use the resonator in order to map the “The Hollow” failed, you later find a larger map at the Fenix estate. Having this with you and fighting off so many Locust scum. You detonate a huge bomb called “The Lightmass Bomb” which will destroy the heart of the Locust Horde.

After playing Gears of War, Epic released a second game on November 7^th, 2008. Gears of War 2 was a huge wait for many. In Gears of War two, you began 6 months after the detonation of the Lightmass bomb. The Locust Horde is still alive and regaining its power. Many cities of Sera at this moment, are sinking and being destroyed. Jacinto, the main stronghold of the humans is losing its protection. The remaining COG decides to do a counter attack and dig through Locust tunnels. Along their way, they find the humans are being captured and tortured making them look zombie-like. After realizing how huge the Locust Horde, the only thing they could do left was to sink Jacinto and hope the gushing water floods the entire Locust away. During the ending credits, you hear Marcus’s father, Adam Fenix, voice asking, “What have you done?” This gives the gamers a cliffhanger.

Now, what has happened since these two parts? In Gears of War 3, it has been 18 months since the flooding of Jacinto. Chairman Prescott, the leader of the COG, has decided to abandon everyone. The COG has become leaderless. The survivors have relocated to an island called, “Vectes.” After a short period, a new enemy has emerged from the ground. As I stated before, everywhere you go, you will see The Lambent. While struggling to fight off the Lambent and recovering supplies, Chairman Prescott has come back and gave Marcus news of his father being alive and a key encrypted. Now, there’s a new mission to complete.

During the game, you’re going to be fighting off huge amounts of Lambent. Due to the fact the humans are struggling for survival, Epic has became quite creative with this aspect. Looking for ammo is a pain in this game. Not only is it hard to find ammo, there are new creatures called, “Wild Tickers.” Unlike the Tickers that are Lambent, these Tickers will nothing harmful, but eat your ammo. If the Wild Tickers are not a problem, then trying to reach your supply might be. You might be able to get it, but all of the sudden it falls down a cliff. Cliffs and the environment are pretty decent in the game.

Looking around, you see mountain ranges, oceanic areas etc. Epic has made the game look beautiful. Being able to interact with some of the environment might get you into a heap of trouble though. Some locations are lovely horrible. What I mean by this is there are some areas that are remains of Hammer of Dawn strikes. Epic truly does try to show you the aftermath. Not only is the feel of the environment well done, but the characters as well.

During the previous games, you didn’t exactly what these wars are doing to these characters. Epic Games generally changed that. In Gears of War 3, you get to go back to Cole’s hometown. The Cole Train lives on. You will see how once famous Thrashball player changes its emotion when arriving back from war. Even the look of Dom’s heartbroken state, when returning to Maria’s hometown was nicely done. The characters who sat during the previous games, like Anya Stroud, are now a playable character. Epic was pretty smart allowing women to fight instead of their overused steroid men. Playing as the opposite can be fun, but Epic tried getting women to play their game. It’s not a bad or positive move, but I don’t think it made any difference.

The online is great with its dedicated servers, but the matchmaking doesn’t balance level or rank that well. Allowing people play a decent game without the shout of “He/she” is using host powers” is great. Sometime the game freezes up online and it’s usually due to Epic’s server being down. The newer weapons like The Oneshot are pretty awesome. New and old maps have returned to Gears of War 3. Gridlock, which was in the previous games, has come back. I have two problems with Gridlock. One is hearing Madworld play over and over. The other is it’s not original. It still has the same layout as the others, except this time you can’t climb in the bed of the trucks.

There are also new game modes. Players can team up and play through the campaign act/chapters in Arcade mode. Like many games nowadays, you can check your career score with friends and other players. Epic also created Beast Mode. Beast Mode is the complete opposite of Horde Mode. Instead of killing waves of the Locust Horde, you get to kill waves of the COG with any of the Locust. Want to kill a Locust with a Ticker? Be my guess and try pulling off the kamikaze missions.

Epic has done one thing that surely will piss off most of its players off. Epic has decided to charge people to buy skins of their weapons. Some may be earned, but most are bought with MS points. I also didn’t know Epic charged people for rockets of their newest creation called “The Silverback.” What the fuck Epic? You're making an awesome game so far, but you decided to charge people for skins and rockets? Also, just to add on to that minor frustration. Does anyone think the Silverback look like Amplified Mobility Platform (AMP) suits from James Cameron’s Avatar?

The controls are pretty alright, but there are still some flaws to them. It takes awhile to execute a downed opponent, because they will try to crawl away and it sometimes screws up. Sometimes hopping over random objects sometimes lags or you might not have the enemy lose balance and stumble.

Overall this is a pretty damn good game. Seeing whether the new Carmine lives or die was pretty funny. There are some noticeable flaws, but I don’t think they’re that important to not get this game. When Rod Ferguson said the beta is used to polish the game up, he meant it. The game is shining which is why I give it an A-

+ Dedicated Servers

-Matchmaking isn’t balanced.

+Great Cast

-Jace bitches too much

+Amazing environment

+Horde Mode is amazing

+Beast Mode…

-Only 12 Waves?

+/- Carmine

-Charging for Skins and Rockets…WTF?

based on GameRevolution.com's classic grading scale.

UghRochester Is Back online (rant)

It all began one day when I was told my mother, step-dad, and younger brother were moving. I already live three miles away from work. Where they were moving to, my father would no longer be able to take me to work, unless I give him more gas money than usual. You don’t have to be a moron to know how expensive gas is nowadays. I had to come up with an idea fast. There were many options, but I narrowed it down to one. It was time to move in with my father. He has no internet or even cable.

So having no internet and cable doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world. They’re just simply entertainment and I could live without them. In fact, I have plenty of games for my Xbox 360 to help me not be bored. Many I haven’t finished the main story/season and some I haven’t even played. Poor Alan Wake is still wrapped in cellophane. Everyone has been telling me, “Howard, get Alan Wake out of the cellophane now!” GR’s danielrbischoff even told me to get Alan Wake out of the cellophane. I’ve been looking through my stack of games and to my amazement, many of the games I own all have a short span for single playing. Most of them are online. It irritated me, because I missed out on so much online. Playing with myself (giggity) was getting boring. Realizing this, I just had to get internet back.

My social life sucks. Is it, because I only complement women when they deserve it? Maybe or is it due to the fact I speak before I think and therefore giving everyone the most honest answers? Truth hurts sometimes, but at least I’m not someone acting like someone else just to get a piece of ass. Anyhow, my social life sucks IRL. I used to be a kid that was all shy and nervous. That was until I worked at McDonald’s. Somehow, I gained the confidence to interact with the opposite sex. This doesn’t mean my social life got better. It meant I was going to get slapped much more.

Now that I have online again, I can social with many people around the world. Using the internets gives you the opportunity to be nosy. Sitting there at my desk, I can switch open to a tab and see what’s going on around the world with a simple click of the mouse. Looking at my social networking feed, I can see what’s going on in the video game industry or see if any of my friends are pregnant. The endless possibility of using the internet is in my own hands again. Even though my social life sucks IRL, My social life doesn’t suck on Xbox LIVE. Interacting with other gamers is way better than playing with yourself. If games didn’t have online features, then perhaps they would have a longer and better story. L.A. Noire is one of the games that were great just for its single playing. I’m currently playing Batman: Arkham City and enjoying its single playing. Never felt much like The Batman when playing both Arkham Asylum and Arkham

So, I’m back online. I’m still the same UghRochester that few still love. The only difference is I can now be much happier and much satisfied with my gaming. What will happen now is a mystery.

UghRochester: TV-B-Gone mission

Assassins in video games I feel are the best assassins in the world. They have unique senses that allow the player to know if they’re being detected and they have terrific abilities to make them undetected. Of course, it’s the player who controls the character’s movements and powers. Today, I’m going to share with you in this entry a story of a mission I proposed myself. This isn’t just any mission, this is my mission.

Today at Wal-Mart, I was walking throughout the store hoping I would turn the TVs off. I would turn these TVs off by using a device known as, “The TV-B-Gone” This was my mission to create a prank and film it. Showing the film to my friends and laughing was nothing, but pure comedy. Unfortunately for me, I was being followed, and being kept an eye on from various employees. Being detected was not an option for me. However, I was detected and had to abort my mission. Now I must learn from my mistakes and redeem myself.

My mistakes caused me to abort my mission. Learning from your mistakes is always a huge part in success. If you were working on something and have failed, learn what your mistakes were and try again. Failing is just another way of way of saying, “You lose! Continue?” Anyhow, my first mistake was not knowing. The G.I. Joes’ says, “Knowing is only half the battle.” This is true! Knowing your surroundings and enemies gives you advantages in the battlefield. Once again, my mistake was not knowing. I had no organization whatsoever. I had only Just an idea of taking a camera inside using my TV-B-Gone.

The second mistake I made was my items being used. I have this Flip camera that is sort of bulky and very noticeable. Standing still holding the camera instantly gave it away. As I mentioned before, I was using the TV-B-Gone. The TV-B-Gone is a small universal remote that is capable of turning just about any TV sets off. This device was great for my stealth mission, but the timing for the device would interfere.

Lastly, the biggest mistake was me. Not me in general, but my size structure. If you saw me from time to time, you would see I’m clearly above average (giggity) in both weight and height. I’m a pretty huge guy. Doing something suspicious can make me detectable quite easily.

Looking at all my mistakes, I came up with a guide that might help me out. If you’re a prankster looking to do something quite similar, maybe my guide might help you out as well.

First problem that needs to be resolved is my Flip camera. As I stated before, it’s bulky and very noticeable. My solution for this is to get some clothes in the clothing aisle and hide the camera between the clothes. If I was a woman, I would just hide the camera in my purse. The last problem to be resolved was me. Like I mentioned, I’m pretty huge (giggity), but It also has advantages. I can use my height to oversee the aisles and check if any employees are coming or not.

If knowing is only half the battle, then there is only one half that needs to be finished. Tomorrow is another day, and those TVs will be turned off. Unlike video game characters, I don’t have any senses telling me there’s someone behind me. I must blend in with the crowd and become undetectable. My username is UghRochester, and I’m a TV killer.

Call of Duty: Elite beta preview

Call of Duty: Elite is like a combination of Bungie’s file share and Halo Waypoint. All of these have one thing in common, data. Call of Duty: Elite is a place where you can check your stats (in real time), career history, etc. I know there are some of you out there that claim to be “pro gamers.” I’m sure reading your own stats and seeing what you need to improve on is what might help you out. Even if you’re not a pro gamer, just bragging to your friends about you awesome kill/death ratio would be fun too right?

Another feature of Call of Duty: Elite, is its social network being inserted. You can talk to and post comments to gamers around the world about their game play they posted. If you’re not socially awkward, then joining a group is always great. There’s variety of groups out there that’ll let you join. For an example, if you’re in the Pittsburgh area, you can find a group that matches your criteria.

Not only can you join groups and make other friends, but you can also add your own rivalries. Rivalries are great again if you’re trying to show off your statistics. You can even customize your own leader boards of friends and yourself।

Another feature in the beta is their contest they’re constantly throwing. Players can “enlist” in an even on the calendar. By enlisting into an event, you’re competing with other players of that match variance. Some are just fun to watch, others are probably boring. I enjoy being able to see who has the best tomahawk video.

This is pretty much what Call of Duty: Elite is. It’s a service being developed by Beachhead studio. Don’t worry; there are plenty of features that you get for free. I haven’t seen how much the premium members get or how much it cost, but I do know they get all the DLC for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3

Call of Duty: Elite releases with Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 this November 8th, 2011

L.A. Noire review

The years after World War II, many lives were damaged. The economy, in most places, was nothing, but devastation. In this time of crisis, many looked to Los Angeles and saw Hollywood as a place for relief. An “American Dream” filled with fame and glamour, having everything you ever desired. Unfortunately, this was only in the minds of citizens. The fact was, most of the streets lied; filming industries focusing their sexual jollies toward unexpected naive women, large amounts of troops trying to readjust their lives leaving what was horrendous in the war all behind. When you come to Los Angeles, you will find out quite quickly of the corrupted of police and government. L.A. is only an illusion of happiness. To some, it’s their fantasy.

The first thing you’re going to notice in the game is the works of MotionScan. I’m quite amazed how the detailed facial capturing looks in this game. Recognizing some of the actors in the game made me over thrilled. It was amazingly easy to recognize Greg Grunberg during a case. Not only was MotionScan awesome with facial capturing, the physical movements of each actor/actresses are they’re actual movements being captured with a mocap suit They even have a Black/White filter, which makes the game look astonishing. This was by far one of the greatest features of the game. Without this, I don’t know how this game could be ever created. Now, enough of me drooling over this creation, let’s talk more about the game shall we.

In L.A. Noire you’re mainly playing the role of Cole Phelps. Cole Phelps is a World War II veteran. Serving two years of the war in the navy as a lieutenant, Lt. Phelps was awarded one of Navy’s highest honors, the Silver Star. Honoring and serving his country, Cole decided to become part of the Los Angeles Police Department, thus allowing Cole to serve his country furthermore. Famous for his Silver Star, he became quite a character towards the L.A.P.D. No matter where you look, someone will always mention his Silver Star.

Starting out as a puny police officer, you’ll be working your way up to Ad Vice. After doing so many cases, you’ll get promoted. Sometimes, you get demoted, but that’s just part of the storyline. Each time you get promoted to a higher authority, you get much more difficult cases.

Each case starts out as if you’re watching a classic detective movie. Most of these cases are based on actual events. The Black Dahlia case, famously, is one few known cases you get to investigate. To solve the cases, you have to go to the crime scene and look around for clues. Clues can be anything from a cigarette butt, to a water valve. Finding the clues is one of the fun parts, holding an object doesn’t give you a clue right away. You have to manipulate and object until you get in the right position. If you found something irrelevant to the crime scene, your character will say something. I’m not saying you’re going to end up like the Hardy Boys, but by golly is it fun searching for the clues. Some clues are hard to find, some of them aren't

During the game, you will also see a bundle of flashbacks of Cole’s time in the Navy. These flashbacks are in the story, because they will somehow relate to other events in the game. The flashbacks are confusing at first, but if you keep your own notes and memory, you’ll find it will be a great way to comprehend the storyline.

While working your way up ladder of justice, you’ll also be able to gain an experience level. Each level of rank, you’re rewarded with most of a time, an unlockable suit that will have a perk or two. Sometimes you’ll receive a new weapon. To rank up your experience level, you’ll have to learn how to read faces during interviews. Even though the MotionScan they used for the game is incredible, reading faces are one of the most difficult parts of the game. You’ll have three different options when you’re interviewing a person of interest. First, is “Truth.” Truth simply means the person is telling the truth. Then there’s the infamous “Doubt.” Doubting a suspect means you know the person is lying, but you don’t have any evidence to back it up with. If you do have evidence, and can prove the person did something of values, then you could use the “Lie” option. You’ll notice Cole Phelps loves to start off calm then gets louder and LOUDER!

Not only does ranking up help you get unlockables, it also helps you your cases. If you have online, each level you rank, you’ll be rewarded intuition points. Intuition points help you out by “finding all clues” in a crime scene, removes an answer in an interrogation. You can even ask Rockstar’s Social Club to see what percentage of each choice are.

Now, let’s talk about the controls in the game. The controls are quite simple. Driving around feels like GTA IV. Shooting in the game feels like you’re playing Red Dead Redemption. Rockstar is doing something new, they’re clearly pointing out this game isn’t supposed to be anywhere near what GTA IV or RDR was. I applaud Rockstar for their new approach. Even though they did a great job, there are still some flaws to the game.

One the flaws I found in the game, was searching for clues. The clues are a little difficult to find. Most of the time, you’re walking around the crime scene waiting for your controller to vibrate. There were also occasional glitches. Someone pointed out the glitch with Cole Phelps’s hat glitch, running up walls and sometimes falling down for no reason were a few glitches I found. Free roaming and side cases I count as a flaw, because they aren’t necessary in my opinion. I was quite happy playing over 20 hours of the game’s main storyline. Some may find that too short, I find it quite right. Don’t want to overkill a game with a long ass story now would you?

Even with the occasional flaws of the game, this is by far one best games I’ve ever seen from Rockstar. Rockstar’s new approach maybe a little bold, but man you got to love it. Again, their MotionScan is incredibly well done. Being able to actually interrogate people was so realistic. Luckily, Rockstar gave L.A. Noire an amazing cast. This game deserve its A-

+Motionscan is awesome
+Classical mystery theme game
+Interrogation is fun
+/- Finding clues
+/-Freeroam/Sidemissions
-Occasional glitches

*grading scale is based on GameRevolution.com's classic grading scale.

Duke Nukem Forever Review

Holy hell! After 14 years? This game has been one of the longest development timed game I’ve seen. Teaser after teaser, fans could not get enough Duke. Duke Nukem was the sh*t. It’s time frame, I witnessed; two different U.S. presidents, new video game systems, Drew Carey losing weight, should I continue? What is surprising was seeing this game kept coming back for more hype. After a while, people started to feel like, “Meh, don’t care about your trailer.” In fact, Thinkgeek.com used Duke Nukem Forever as their April Fools geek product. So, knowing how long the game has been in development, let’s see what we have in store for us.

Duke Nukem Forever is about an almost retired Duke. After saving earth years before, Duke Nukem has gain so much fame, he is now like Brawndo from Idiocracy. Everywhere you look, you find something Nukem has accomplished. Anything from winning boxing matches, to be a TV phenomenon, Duke has done it all. With women wanting to grab a hold of Duke, what more excitement does he need?

Well it turns out, the aliens haven’t gone away. The President believes these aliens are friendly. Seriously, do you actually believe a pig cop has such an honest face? Of course not. “Those alien bastards” has their mothership hovering over Duke’s town? I don’t know what to call it. The aliens came back and they’re ready to take over. Once again, Duke Nukem is our only hope. Can he conquer the aliens, yet alone his most likely case of arthritis?

Speaking of arthritis, this game reminds me of Sylvester Stallone getting ready for a remake of Rocky. With Duke being old and still uses his steroids; he’s going to need some weapons. Throughout the game you only get to see a handful of weapons. Not that much of a selection. In fact, you get as much as you did while playing Duke Nukem 3D. So the weaponry is a little lame. Big whoop, I still have faith in game the despite the other reviews mentioning how horrible the game is.

Let’s talk about the visual experience you get inside this game. I’m going to sum it with a quick little poem, “Wherever you are, no matter what you see. The imagery is terrifying. So much, you have to pee.” That’s right; I pissed myself seeing how horrible the graphics in this game looked. Using the Unreal Engine, I thought it might look good. No, this game looks horrendous. It’s pixilated as **** and if you think you’re looking to see hot women in this game, good luck trying. I tried getting turned on by the women in this game, but nothing. Not even the women showing their breast would change my mind of how horrible the game looks.

It’s not just the looks of the game I’m concerned about how the feel of the game is. From what I experience, the controls are pretty decent. If you’re the kind of person who likes to go in spraying bullets, then you’re going to like the feel. If you’re someone like me who likes to take cover and shoot in burst, then you’re in for a treat. The bosses can be easily killed if you’re constantly circling them around. Somehow, they act like giant airheads. The aiming with the weapons are pretty good. It’s when you mess around with the environment that makes me want to shoot myself. Playing pinball is always fun. Same with; Air hockey, basketball, Whack-A-Something etc. When you play around with these environments in the game, you’re going to want to shoot yourself. Can’t tell you how many times it took just so I could hit the damn air hockey puck. Picking stuff up is annoying whenever the item is close to another item. It’s so hard just to pick something up.

Not only is picking stuff up so difficult, but some of the dialogue in the game is a hit and miss. The jokes in the game are funny, but you have to know where they’re from. Most players wouldn’t understand jokes like The Princess Bride joke. Shrunken Duke kills the giant rats and says, “Talk about rodents of unusual size.” Yet, the majority would understand the Master Chief joke. You clearly see Master Chief’s armor in the van and Duke says, “Power Armor is for pussies.” Again, the comical parts of the dialogue are usually a hit and miss.

The multi-playing in the game is pretty much what you received with Duke Nukem 3D. You get the new “My dig” feature which is a place where you can store your numerous amounts of stuff. In order for you to get stuff for your dig, you will have to play online matches. The online match types are your same FPS game types that have been with us as long as this game was in development. You have “Dukematch” and “Team Dukematch” Can you guess what these are? They’re a type of Free For All and Team Deathmatch. You also get “Capture the Babe” and “Hail to the King.” I’m sure you played FPS games and can guess what the last two game types are. Other than the online feature, it is basically Duke Nukem 3D.

This game wasn’t worth 14 years. In fact, I was six years old when this game was first mentioned. After years and years, the nostalgia got the best of me. I went and purchased the game. Already had a feeling this game wouldn’t turn out so great, but bought the game anyways. I’m sure most of you already know this game isn’t the best. Perhaps another 14 years we can make the right decision, since they hinted in the game about another title. Until then, “Fail to the king.”

+ It’s Duke Nukem
+/-Controls
+/- The dialogue jokes
+/- Story
-Multiplayer is the same
-Development timeframe
-Visuals

*grading scale is based on GameRevolution.com's classic grading scale.

Epic Games: Desperate Wars

Wow, it has been a while since I last wrote a blog entry. Perhaps rehabilitating from my less than 24 hour job at GR is most likely the reason I haven’t been writing much. Now, time to make amends. In this article I’m going to criticize Epic Games about their Gears of War 3 Multi-player beta and their desperate attempt at people buying Gears of War 3.

On April 25^th, Epic Games released their Gears 3 Beta for anyone who pre-ordered their game (April 18^th for Bulletstorm: Epic Edition owners). Allowing this beta is hopefully giving Epic Games enough time to polish the new abilities and making the weaponry balanced and joyful for gamers. Gaining access to the beta is great and gives you that special feeling knowing you were part of something “revolutionary.” Unfortunately, Epic Games have been promoting their beta too much.

Their promotion to gain “special” access in their beta gained attention when announcing it to be released with Bulletstorm: Epic Edition. The true fans of Gears of War titles (like me) quickly went and pre-ordered Bulletstorm. Epic announced they would “only” give players the special access if they would buy Bulletstorm. Ok Epic, you’re doing what Bungie decided to with Halo: Reach. Announcing people will get the beta, but you have to purchase a game full of crap. I apologize; it wasn’t that bad of a game. It’s a game people would rent before purchasing. So, this doesn’t really convince me. Do people with the access to the beta get anything else special? Yes, they also announced exclusive content that will be carried over to the full game. Sweet! I get to show off my flamed weapons and Thrashball Cole! Suck on that you peasants! And incomes an announcement that soon upset many gamers.

Few months later, Epic announced people who pre-ordered Gears of War 3 will also be able to have special access to the beta. Whoa, wait a second. You mentioned a few months back the “only” way into the beta was to purchase Bulletstorm, the true and only way. How could you do this Epic? You just lied and became such a dishonest pile of ****. All from not getting enough players to access the beta, you go a step further, lie to fans and promote the access to beta with pre-ordering the full game. This is a douche move you’re doing, Epic. From what I’ve been witnessing, you’ve seem desperately to put more sales on this game.

In April, I was watching my favorite programs on TV, when I saw a commercial that made me laugh upsettingly (yes, laughing upsettingly). It was a one of the GameStop commercials that are used to basically to say, “Hey...pre-order *insert product here* and get whatever.” I don’t believe it, how desperate are you, Epic? Do you seriously need to make so many promotions already? Look at all what you did and it’s only for the beta! So, now the question was, “What do people get if they access the beta from pre-ordering Gears of War 3?” They get everything Bulletstorm owners got, except for one lousy flamed Hammerburst since Bulletstorm owners gained one week early access.

So, now we wait until the full game releases. Epic Game, in my opinion, is desperate for this game to sell and is low for being dishonest to its consumers. Believe me; Bulletstorm purchasers received the full definition of the phrase “caveat emptor.” In conclusion, I’m going to mention my three predictions of what Epic is going to do with the release of Gears of War 3.

First, they’re going promote the release like they did with the beta. They will be doing so because of their Limited Edition and Epic Edition product details have yet to be announced. All we know is their cost by looking at websites such as GameStop. Will they promote it like they did with the beta? I wouldn’t believe it to be that desperate. Secondly, they’re going to screw the beta users over. More and likely the “exclusive” content that will carry over to the full game, makes me feel everyone has a chance to earn it. Lastly, Epic is going to be bummed out. Of all their hard work in their marketing strategy, they won’t win GOTY.

Midnight Launch: The Survial Guide To Home

So you’re on your way to the midnight launch. You’ve brought your entertainment and the delicious munchies to endure the line filled with fans. A friend has even chosen to come and enjoy the time with you. “Three…two…one…HOORAY!” It’s now time to get your game, and boy you’ve been eagerly waiting to play the game, but how will you be able to protect yourself on the way back home?

Your safest route would have to be driving back home with your friend escorting your game back. This will eliminate most of the muggers that might approach you. Even if someone approaches your door that you don’t know, lock your doors first. If he/she tells you to get out of the car in a mean tone, don’t be a ******* and get out. You can easily drive away, chances are his/her two feet won’t be able to catch up to you.



What happens if you don’t know have a ride back? Well escorting the package unarmed is always a bad thing. Never go to a midnight launch without a source of weaponry. If you’re a hardcore gamer, you might have bought replica swords, axes, etc. Like a hardcore gamer like myself, I’ve bought a replica of Link’s Master Sword. This baby will always protect me from any danger.



Sadly, due to most places, carrying a sword is against the law to carry. If you’re not able to carry the sword, not to worry, a nice handgun could be a better option. Like a sword, in most places it’s illegal to carry, but you can always try getting a permit. I dislike the idea of carrying a handgun; they could shoot off even if you don’t want it to. This can result in getting yourself harmed and as well as others. I dislike usage of handguns the most in this scenario

“Well UghRochester, what if we don’t have swords or handguns?” Well, you can always carry a pocket knife. Unlike handguns and swords, carrying a knife with you (depending on the size and style) is completely legal in most places. I’m a Batman fan (if you couldn’t tell by my tattoo) so I carry around a double-sided Bat-Knife. This baby will always protect me. The big plus is it fits in your pockets and the muggers won’t know you have one. “Hey, give me your game!” “Ok, just joking here you go instead *insert stab sound*.” I feel carrying a knife is one thing you should always carry with you wherever you go.



Ok, enough with over-protecting thyself. If you have no weaponry to defend yourself, I guess all you can do is fight back with you arms and legs. If you’re a complete douche bag, you can always leave a friend behind (if one does come). If not, then you should really learn to RUN!

Bulletstorm Review

Say it, and then spray it!

You have badass weapons, now use them. Kill them with skill and make sure that the bloodlust travel through each and every vein! Yes sir!

In Bulletstorm, you are Grayson Hunt, an alcoholic space pirate with a bounty and thirst to avenge his team that was betrayed by General Serrano. Grayson is a massively buff man that looks like Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine, and a voice that you would think to be Marcus Fenix. Sorry, John DiMaggio didn’t do his voice. Weirdly, Steven Blum who did the voice of Wolverine in animated series is Hunt. Along your side to kill this son of the b*tch, is Ishi Sato. Sato is your only friend left of Dead Echo, who had to become cyborg after crash landing and saving him on an unknown planet. The alliance between you two is not that great, and it’s even worst when Sato can’t control his A.I. side. Even if you two aren’t close pals, avenging your team’s lives and getting Serrano back is your main objective. Serrano is on this planet somewhere, and he’s not going away empty handed.

While investigating and searching the planet for Serrano, you’re going to be encountering a bunch of hostiles, hostiles that sure love bullets. You’re going to come across, extremely-mutated mutants, man-eating plants, and even this giant monster that you might think it resembles Godzilla. All these ugly looking creatures need to die one way or another. To kill these hideous looking things, you get decisions to make. Do you want to blow them into bits? If you want to, go ahead but I don’t think that takes much skill. “Skill points” is what we’re trying to get. The more creative you kill something. The more you get skill points. These points help you out in the long-run by giving you more weapons to choose from. So instead of just blowing something up, be creative and try out one of my favorites called, “mercy” Mercy is when you shoot someone right in the balls and shoot their heads off while they’re crying in agony. Brutal it is, and so hilarious.

How about the environment of this game? This game looks like one giant Jacinto from the Gears of War series. The “green glowing radiation” that you will stumble upon looks exactly like the immulsion from the Gears of War series. The art is so similar to Epic’s other games, it’s just a little sad.

I don’t even know how to explain the plot. The story is so basic. Everything is predictable in my opinion. A few twist every now and then, but you might be able to predict it better than what I did. What I liked about it, was the cheesy adult humor they throw into it. Cursing like sailors and the unique ways kill something had me rolling on the floor laughing my ass off. Yes, I enjoyed the humor in it, but the story was short and repetitive. Like Gears of Wars, they ended the game with a cliff-hanger, and a surprise at the end of the credits.

The online multi-playing should be changed to online co-op. There’s anarchy mode which is basically survival mode. You get to fight off waves and try to survive. Teamwork is much needed since you have to get a decent enough score in order to move on. One downfall is playing teaming up with little kids that mommies and daddies will buy for the rotten little brats…err I mean for the nice sons and daughters. And there’s Echoes mode, if you want to compete with friends in something in this game. You can try this mode out and experience different parts of the campaign once again. Whether you like that sort of competition is up to you.

The multi-playing isn’t that great. The campaign is pretty solid, but it’s repetitive. Adult humor and the unique violent ways to kill in this game is what really made Bulletstorm. The majority of the people who are buying this game, will probably be those who want the Gears of War 3 Beta. That is why I’m going to give this game a “B”

+ Adult language
+ Shooting the balls
+ Cool ways to kill someone
+/- You can tell it’s an Unreal Engine
+/- Gears of War 3 Beta (Xbox 360 only)
- Gets Repetitive
- Lacks multi-playing
- Short story

*grading scale is based on GameRevolution.com's classic grading scale.